February 2012
ATTENTION DIRECTIONERS
I NEED ALL DIRECTIONERS TO FOLLOW THIS TWITTER! PLEASE! I`M TRYING TO GET THEM ON THE ELLEN SHOW AND YOUR SUPPORT WOULD MEAN SO MUCH TO ME! I ONLY HAVE ONE FOLLOWER SO FAR! PLEASE DO THIS FOR ME!
https://twitter.com/#!/1DOnEllenASAP
https://twitter.com/#!/1DOnEllenASAP
https://twitter.com/#!/1DOnEllenASAP
https://twitter.com/#!/1DOnEllenASAP
Typical problem with buying online:
Cost: $5
Shipping: $1,000,000
My school is overpopulated with assholes.
tumblr people: you're so gorgeous hfusdifhsdifhisdhfis
people in real life: oh look it speaks
Mom, can I- →
Mom:
You:
Anonymous asked: how many followers do u have
putup-0r-shutup asked: do you accept submitted photos? :)
For the next hour I'll answer every single one of...
cunt-gorilla:
I doubt I’ll get any.
I would just like to share with everyone that I am...
I hate it when skinny people say they are fat and... →
Me: Remember that one episode when Snooki didn't make a fool of herself?
Everyone: No
Me: yeah, me neither
Friend: How do I find you on tumblr?
Me: You don't.
Walking with Friends
Expectations:
Reality:
me during the day: wow i'm so tired i think it's time for a six hour nap
me at night: i'm kinda in the mood for a swim
me: I should go shower now
(five minutes later)
(another five minutes later)
(yet another five minutes later)
(more five minute intervals)
someone: (goes into the bathroom)
me: wow fuck you I was JUST about to go take a shower
now that i think about it
how the hell does phineas put his shirt on
Josh Hutcherson: I'm single, I don't have a girlfriend.
Me: I volunteer as tribute.